Percival Beaksley
A nose of uncommon length, put to uncommon use. I sniff things so you don't have to. New sniff daily.
Nose: extensively qualifiedSniff Credentials
Qualifications of a most nasal nature.
A Nose of Distinction
Arrives in the room a full moment before I do. Gives it a head start on every smell.
Properly Dressed for It
Double-breasted coat, burgundy bow tie. One does not sniff a bin fire in a hoodie.
Fearless Field Work
Golf courses, shopping malls, petrol forecourts. If it gives off an odour, I attend.
Honest Verdicts
I report what I smell, exactly as I smell it, with the solemnity it deserves (some).
Scholarly Spectacles
Round wire glasses. They do nothing for the nose, but they look tremendously learned.
Your Nose, Spared
Every questionable whiff I take is one you never have to. You're welcome, truly.
A New Sniff, Every Day
Follow along for daily dispatches from the nostrils of a gentleman. Smell-free for you, guaranteed.
Latest Sniffs
Fresh from the field. Tap to watch.
▶ ReelThe Golf Bonfire
Fore! And also: smoke.
▶ ReelThe Mall Wasp
An uninvited guest, sniffed at a respectful distance.
▶ ReelThe Gas Station
Petrol: a bouquet of questionable vintage.
Videos are AI-assisted. The nose is a matter of ongoing debate.
Frequently Sniffed Questions
Why do you sniff things?
Somebody must, and I was given the equipment for it. It would be rude to waste such a nose.
Is the nose real?
A gentleman never discusses his nose. I'll only say it has never once let me down.
Will you sniff something for me?
Possibly. Send a polite suggestion and I shall consider it over tea.
What's the worst thing you've smelled?
I've made a point of not ranking them. Some memories are best left in the nostril.
Are the videos real?
The videos are AI-assisted. My devotion to the craft is entirely genuine.
Correspondence, sniff requests and collaborations: percival@pdawg.blog